Gremlin Haiku Hijinks
The player-run Gremlin Haiku Hijinks is a forum event from the Summer of 2011.
Sponsored by the Obsidian Guild to herald the arrival of The Ironclaw Munitions Factory,
and the arrival of 2 new gremlin spies...derp...merchants Punch and Vise.
Details
Competition details are at the following link: http://forums.spiralknights.com/en/node/12071
Entries are only accepted through the official Spiral Knights forum link or Spiral Knights facebook link: http://www.facebook.com/SpiralKnights
Deadline
July 14, 2011 11:59PM Central (GMT-5) -CLOSED-
Judges
- Raspberry
- Thebadger
- Eurydice
Prizes
The Spiral Haiku Master Receives:
- 100,000 Crowns
- 1000 CE
- A Wallpaper Honoring the Winning Haiku
Honorable Mentions Receive:
- 15,000 Crowns
Gremlin Haiku Library
The haiku are sorted alphabetically by the IGN(or forum name, if IGN wasn't given) of the submitter.
A
Agger
Gremlins gremlins, what
y'gonna do? What y'gonna do
when they come for you?
Alexest
Gremlin in the night
Wandering in the bazaar
Merchanting he likes
Amethyzt
We stand together!
Their hatred burns very hot!
Knights of Haven go!!!
Armorjack
June is dry tinder.
Tier Three fires burn shyly:
In tier one decon!
Azafran
I hate those gremlins
deadly wannabe humans
need we any more?
Azerk
Small dark eyes glaring
Scaly claws grasp your money
Ripped off once again
B
Battlebeard
Gremlin team hurts you
You go buy from "nice" Gremlin
He was team leader
Betrael
new boss, hiding foes
sneaky spies of gremlin blood
hidden, wait for you
Bigfootm
Gremlins in Haven.
Is it the Unbind Center?
Crazy at bazzar.
Boelens
Gremlins
Damage armor
Merchant happy
Bomb-Blaster
More and more missiles,
Flash...and the big puppies come,
The battle begins!
Boss-Scarmiglione
Rockets, Missiles, BOOM!
Beware big towering twins,
Or face destruction.
Boxboxbox
gremlins bizarre sale
strangers thought, will the snipes like
still give me shinies
Brischli
Gremlin over there!
Draw my sword and charge right in,
just to realize that it's a merchant Gremlin.
Brysonic
We welcomed them in
All was well, until we heard
Those dire words, "Stay Close!"
C
Catrix
Menders fill my woe
as the red numbers stack high
no true end in sight
Comradeer
Knight wants Menders dead
Gremlin Merchant sells him sword
Sword breaks at first hit.
Coolsoul
Gremlins come to help,
But you see their tricky ways,
And run, run away!
Couture
a gremlin haiku?
what is this I don't even...
too busy grinding
Crashfu
Gremlins come to us,
In this our town of haven.
Spy cam in the Loo...
Credendo
Emerging Shadows
Reveal a new villain
The outlook was grim
D
Dasparian
Crimsonite + Moonstone =
Mechanized Mile, Decon Zones.
Where's my Dark Matter…
Dayte
An Ironclaw Demo?
Going nuts behind that gate!
I'm on this side though ~<3
Decibel
Bombs are confusing.
Spiral Knights look like they know
what to do. Here, catch!
Desdinova
gremlin merchants here!
do they sell anything new?
just gremlin gizmo
Dhobby
Gremlins are coming
Unsheathe your shadow weapons
Kill the healers first
Diggidy
I hear them plotting
Filling Cradle with their stench
Trust gremlins? Never
Dirty-Harry
More than one mender
Hammers surrounding my rear
please don't thwack me bro.
Dogrock
Munitions abound
Pyros o'er yonder training
This will not end well
Doom-Dude
Its all about trust,
Gremlin Merchant fits or not?
Only time shall tell...
Drakexxq
Gremlins one and two
Spies or merchants, which is true?
Guess it's up to you!
Drandor
Factory means jobs!
Such as spies and guardians
Against pesky knights
Drmchsr
Mechanical Fiends!
Their Arcane Factory Looms!
Onwards, Knights! To Glory!
Drthz
Can they be trusted
Ironclaw in our Haven
Or will we all burn?
Duskdash
Mender ascetics:
while clockworks turn like seasons,
hone ironclaws on spikes.
Dziurka
Merchant's watchful eye,
Coldly watching as knight dies
Trust them you cannot
E
Espeonage
It's the gremlin boss
mender fly; I have no gun
hijink win this time..!
Exnem
Factory is a go!
Stay a while and listen!
Shields are wise ahead!
F
Farewells
The Gremlin is hiding
They come to watch, Eyes open!
The sale begins!
FelXaga
I fix broken things
Knights like to make broken things
I make knights broken
Final-Crescendo
Gremlin transmission
Says, "Burn Haven to the ground!"
We prepare for war
Flehrad
Gremlin axe hurt much
Knight need better equipment
Gremlin merchant smiles
Fording
The one who
Owns a thwack hammer
Fears not
Frizz
Gremlins with big guns
Bombs, Hammers, Menders! Oh my!
I have my sword ready
Frozyn
Fire crackle and roar
Three heroes stand on button
Afk knight snore
Fusoya
No food past midnight
Not your typical mogwai
This guys no Gizmo
G
Geil
Knight In Skelly Helm
Sinister Grin Charges Sword
Flash Of Light Corpse Dust
Gotname
Redfur fix Clockworks
Redfur has broken something
Redfur needs more bombs
Green-Onion
Gremlin bombs abound
Frenzy heats up the office
Working over knights
Griffinbane
Annoying gremlins.
Alas, a gremlin boss comes!
I shall burn you good.
Grittle
when gremlins are dead
they turn into small kittens
they are sinister
Guardianknight
New Gremlin Merchants?
But I Am Inflammable
Firebreak Armor
Guyjin
Too many Gremlins!
O why did I go solo?
A mecha knight, please!
H
Hecatoncheire
Lighten your spirits!
Fanged merchant friends can help...
Just bring your wallet.
Helmnut
Gremlins in Haven
King Tinkinzar has to know
Traders, Spies Stay Close
Hexxy
King Tinkinzar speaks
Crimson Order battles knights
For Cradle's future.
Hirus
The twin shopkeepers
Ride a breeze to market square.
Will costs rise like sun?
Hlowan
Two gremlin merchants...
They are spies! Looks like they are...
Sappin' my Haven!
Hollowxxvii
Axes razor sharp
Watching re-runs on TV
Healer ahhhhhh aight.
I
Ibubble
Gremlins are so cute.
But may be spies! awww so cute...!!!
Too cute *Frogpalm* dies...
Iskender
They have run over
In order to support you
Energy only.
Itep
We build new constructs
with new thwack hammers in hand
we fight to mend
K
Katmint
Deep in the Clockworks
Mender fires ember bolt
Embarrassing death
Kalsb
Outcasts with distrust
Will they really help us out?
Emberlight Gremlins
Kevaan
Oh freaking Gremlins!
How can you all torch me so!?
Oh God oh God oh-
Keiko
Welcome to Haven!
This Gremlin has things to sell.
"What are you buying?"
Kilrain
Singed fur, toothy grins.
Armor smoking in silence
After thund'rous blasts.
Kimosabe
two gremlin merchants
selling, passing their free time
scorching and bombing
Knightydood
Crafty Scorcher pair
Now the Bazaar is aflame!
A fire sale
Knightlancer
Burn Haven they say?
The Twin Roarmulus awaits!
Things just got hotter!
Kral
Bark Modules tempt us.
Gun puppy or lumber boss?
We will soon find out.
Kuritaro
爆弾を
爆発すると
爆笑し
Translated as:
The Big Angry Bomb
explodes in angry constrast
as laughter explodes.
L
Lawlol
Can't wait for new Boss
New levels, this is so cool
Too bad I can't win
LeJerque
Gremlins aren't so tough.
I can handle guys like you.
OH GOD GUN PUPPIES
Lhykos
From fog, Twins emerge
Roaring, missiles and bullets
Air becomes as death
Lmaoboat
Buy from Gremlins? Ha!
What? A free toaster, you say?
Eh... what could go wrong?
Lordofnecromancers
Advance scouts are here
Plotting Havens ultimate
Demise. Get ready...
M
Markosmesh
New gear in Bazaar!
But so expensive... Damn them,
Those greedy gremlins.
Masterfang
Old Gremlin Motto,
A Manual reads as such:
Dodge, Toss, Toss, Toss, Dodge!
Migake
Big Ol' Tinkinzar
Not another Jelly King
to run this summer!
Morpholomew
Rumoured new stratum
Gremlins with guns, they sell them
Buy cheaply, or die!
Mynarde
Haven, Tinkinzar
Covert means intentions hide
Service knight for naught
Mysticfury
Thunderfist Arenas
Shocking experience
Piercing through metal
N
Natash
Boom Bang Gremlins work
In second tier gather mines
Flamers smile tonight
Necrax
Two shady figures
A cause for celebration?
A battle ahead
Nekosniper
I for one welcome
Our new Gremlin ov-er, uh
I mean these merchants
Neofalcon
Go for the mender
So very close, casts his dome
Bounced into a mine
Noxis
Two little Gremlins
New arrivals in Haven
Are they friends or foes
O
Ozymandius
I hear gremlins shout,
Hammer and Fire! And I see,
Death falls like blossoms.
P
Panzervaughn
Rising tide of flame
shield flickers in the tempest
the others flank right
Parvus
Gazing at the sky
With friends and brothers in arms
Ironclaw wins again
Prisega
The Roarmulus Twins
Our Knights have defeated them
Angered Gremlins come
Providence
Acrid smell of oil;
Twin hounds bereft of mercy:
Leave me alone, jerks.
Pula
Missiles everywhere!
The summer sun shines above.
Knights, we shall prevail!
R
Radish
Clockworks tick as we
tow the pieces of machine.
Our hands bring forth life!
Redten
Sneaky Gremlin kind
Wouldn't trust them with ice cream
What are they planning?
Ren_Partycat
A Gremlin outcast
Stranded deep in the clockworks
He seeks redemption
Rezrov
Two Gremlins, red hair
Their masked eyes are sparkling stars
Born to sell used cars
Rinneval
Gremlins in Bazaar
Defective goods aplenty
Conning knights of crowns.
Riot-Creator
Mysterious place,
Darkness lurks every corner,
No light exists here.
Ryuzhin
The smell of oil
And deconstructed world parts,
But I'm in Haven?
S
Saadi
Gremlins? Let's take them!
"Remember last time?" you say
Oh whoops I'm on fire
Scissoleo
Sounds of Tinkering
Bulky Metal Canines Rise
Endless Projectiles
Shadownox
Those gremlin merchants,
Don't trust them! Probaly spies
Spying in the night...
Silfrith
Mechanics is all
Gremlins enjoy to work hard
Hunting alien knights
Silverfire
A shield of fire
The Sun's jealousy prior
White path green again
Sipher-Mashai
Gremlin Fire Flows
Valkyrie Knight Moaning
On Fire Again
Skrumm
Wrenches don't kill knights.
Soon: Ironclaw factory!
Now, bullets kill knights...
Snipeh
Factory today
Rockets from the darkness fly
I hold X and pray
Sparkyspro
My firotech gun,
Is in need of a replace.
Flamethrower melt face!
Stevel
Once, as they huddle
Scorchers, Menders, and Demos
Slain by one blade
T
Tachiko
I am Spiral Knight.
Thwack! Thwack! Coin! Thwack! Thwack! Thwack! Coin!
Gremlins sell good stuff!
Tantarian
Gremlins around you
Bullets come, dodge them all
Got hit by a wrench
Tedming
Gremlin merchant spies
Sells poor equipment and lies
Then grins as we die.
Teferi
Explosion echoes
Another wave of Rockets.
They had to make two...
Tetrino
Past countless missiles
Prepared to strike down the twins
Oh god lag I'm dead
the_magician59
deceit in haven
war machines rumble forward
according to plan
Therring
Gremlins have arrived.
Enter the Haven Bazaar,
They will be waiting.
The-Unbeatable
Where two gremlins twine:
A place sublime and divine,
What is to occur?
thezeronumber
With shady conduct,
"View our wares, curious one"
The sly Gremlins snarl.
Thunderboltz
Do not be afraid
These gremlins bring goods for sale
Lay down your crowns now
Thunderbunz
Six star sword, you say?!
I'll buy it! Wait… just a fake.
Need more Scam Resist...
Tipiak
Flamelash Arena
When the fire is "broken"
Gremlin barbecue
Tornspirit
Ironclaw crisis
Blast surrounding munitions
Fireworks await
Trojandeathlord
Ironclaws for hire!
Eligible if skilled at:
Bombs; Heals; Thwacks; Scorching.
V
Vestrum
In the factory
Mischievous eyes before me,
But treasure, I seek
Vincey
Bazaar in the sun
Do two new merchants sell? Thwack!
The gathered snipes mourn.
W
Watchey
Gremlins more than one,
Spies or not which is to trust?
Guess its up to us!
Wfawwer
Useless Archeron.
Roarmulus Epilepsy
Burning Computer
Whitelancer
Brave knights be ready
For their love for knights are as
Cold as winter nights
X
Xing-Loong
To Arms fellow Knights!
New Gremlin foes have arrived
We fight for shinies!
Xplad
The merchants are lies
The Ironclaws send their spies
Let's hope no-one dies
Z
Zenstar
IronClaw Gremlins come
I forsee explosions
Craft fire resist gear
Zhouball
Charge! The Spiral Knights
Swing shiny swords at gremlin!
Then looks up at…Thwack!
Spiral Fun-ku Outtakes
The entire Spiral Community had fun tossing non-competition haiku, including staff and judges...
Armorjack
Cicadas and ants,
Butterflies and the silkwings,
Crown loss and lockout!
Dogrock (Slave Labor)
Gremlins beneath feet
Sounds of industry echo
What do they prepare?
Spy intel arrives
Radio transmits static
What beast makes that noise?
A name, "Roarmulus"
The decipher team instructs
"Needs more test subjects"
More chatter is heard
Are those shouts of volunteers?!
Knights shudder in wait
Copy-paste all day
The keys V and C wear down
All day erry day yeah!
Bumbity bump bump
A thread you should recognize
Maybe this will work
Drmchsr
I don't know if The
Good General Patton Approves
Of Gremlins in Haven
But All I Know Is
The fastest route to The Core
Is Through The Factory
"Onwards, Knights!" Patton
would say. "The quickest way home
is through Ironworks!"
Hearing those words, I grab
my Faust and Vog Cub Suit, and
entered Ironworks
Alas, my love, it was
Not to be! A Mender came and
Shot off my poor knee!
As I lay dying, with
my last breath, I silently cursed
General Patton.
Those Gruesome Gremlins!
Their aim: Roast Snipe for Mealtimes!
Boswick, go get them!
Eurydice (Spiral Staff)
Haiku contest judge?
Iceni, I'd be honored!
Awaiting beauty...
Griffinbane
Dogrock missed entries.
Griffy harasses Dogrock.
Dogrock says brain fart.
Dogrock goofed again.
There are two G's on Wiki.
Griff is mindboggled.
Hyperion (Spiral Staff)
I am impressed by
Your splendid imagery and
Crazy haiku skillz
Inhanzt
Poetry is lame
W T F is a haiku
Wikipedia
Writing a haiku
I can't think of syllables
These stupid haikus
Other Spiral Knights
Please go die in a fire
So I get your heat
Disqualify me
mine are not about gremlins
and I posted four
Raspberry (reply to Inhanzt)
Yours resemble trolls
Tad uglier than gremlins
Love the zen thinking
Jesse Henning (facebook)
Spiral Knights Haiku?
You can't make me make one up.
Wait, hang on. Dammit!
Kilrain
Xenophobia
Everywhere in this thread;
Poor gremlin merchants.
Kral
Lots of explosions?
Michael Bay must be down there
In the gremlin forge
Kuritaro
The bomb is now set
like the mirthful smile I wear
what a blast this is!
Scheming, "Love" Puppy
finds reverse psychology,
the cruelest technique
Though we covet coin,
you can keep your gold monsters.
No thank you, we say
Matthew Ku (facebook)
In the gloaming woods
Snarbolax awaits the knights,
Plotting their demise.
Morpholomew
Sell me some ammo
Please new merchant, sell me some!
I need it so bad
Wait, what’s what? Oh no!
Your face is no Stranger, no!
Gremlins all around!
Why - how - are they here
Are we dead? Not yet, not yet
Tenderfoot friendly
What is this surprise?
Gremlin good, Gremlin bad, or
Gremlin spy backstab?
Ironclaw or Darkfang?
A Thwack-mend-scorcher gangbang?
Die with demo bang!
Nearo
I like how people
are abbreviating words
amusing it is
Parvus
Darkfang flamers come
This floor once cold is blazing
3 caps aren't enough
Deconstruction zone
O no here we go again
Fodder for gremlins
Radish
All work and no play.
Building contructs through the night.
Built strong. Built to fight.
Blood, oil, sweat, and tears.
Crafting, building, filled with fears.
Fighting for our lives.
Menders, please spread out!
Bombers, run around and shout!
Go forth! Have no doubt!
Raspberry (Judge)
Gremlin scorcher love
Summer heat wave danger rooms
Singed knight jumps in pond
Flogging continues
Whip, whip, work, work all day long
The slaves need a break
Slave labor Dogrock
Mumbles copy paste haiku
Need more Mountain Dew
No knights will be harmed
In the production of this...
Film at eleven
Redten
Those stupid bombers
Dropping land mines like hot cakes
Fill em' with holes, mates
Big King Tinkinzar
And his nasty gremlin crew
What you gonna do?
Shadownox
Here's King Tinkinzar
With his army of gremlins
Ready to destroy...
Skrumm
What are you sellin'?
I'll buy it at a high price!
Is that all, stranger?
Got a selection
of good things on sale, stranger!
Come back any time.
Just for fun, of course.
I love that merchant so much.
Greatest shop ever.
Spiral HQ (facebook)
Mulling, pondering
intercepted transmission?
Submit your haiku.
Teferi
Clockworks hum behind
patter of feet, Gremlin laughs.
See you soon Haven.
Therring
For my in game name,
My knight is known as Therring.
(I couldn't help it...)
Zenstar
Skelly suit, let's go
Into fiery dungeon depths
Now just skeleton :(
Wolver howl by night
Bright red eyes in the shadows
Pure white fangs flashing
Zhoulball
THWACK THWACK THWACK THWACK THWACK
THWACK THWACK SINGE MEND THWACK BURN THWACK
SEAR TORCH MEND THWACK DEAD
Oh great Tinkinzar
We have brought you test subjects!
Good…*flames rise up* More!
Gremlin Merchant sells.
Gremlin Merchant sabotages.
Gremlin Thwacker wins.
Winners
Spiral Haiku Master:
- ★★★★★Ozymandius
Honorable Mention:
- ★★★★☆Katmint
- ★★★☆☆Tantarian
- ★★☆☆☆Providence
- ★☆☆☆☆Brysonic
Wallpaper
