Machinists (Guild)
From SpiralKnights
Announcements
March 6, 2016 -- Happy (late) New Year!
Two years already huh? Man I feel old. Welp, we better make this year a good one too! ~Kzane
January 4, 2014 -- Happy New Year!
Happy New Year to everyone, let's make it a good one! ~Tea-Wrecks
November 16, 2013 -- Congratulations
Very late congratulations are in order to the two new Guild Masters: Shmoot and Quartic! If you see these two tired things waddling around, offer them a hand - it's not easy to handle a guild full of crazy bombers. ~Tea-Wrecks
October 6, 2013 -- Retirement
I've contemplated on this for quite some time but I believe my recent game productivity speaks for itself. However, I will make brief reappearances. Thanks for the good times and I'll miss you all! Until then, where are my tacos? ~UtmostProvocative
May 19, 2013 -- Break
I should have announced this earlier, but I am (and have been) taking a temporary break from SK. ~Pyne
March 19, 2013 -- Two New Officers
Quartic and Shmoot will now share the dirty work. Let's all cooperate! ~Pyne
About Us
We are a close-knit guild that specializes in (but is not limited to) Blast Network. Our goal is to keep the beloved mini-game alive by creating a respectable, friendly, and encouraging environment for all players.
Guild Etiquette
As a member of the guild, you must know and abide by the rules and policies.
- The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. (And as if this weren't enough, treat everyone with respect and kindness.)
- Guild Resources: Be sensible about the resources available to you. The guild storage and Mist Well are for everyone's convenience, but do not be a glutton without contributing.
- Guild Hall Upkeep: It is recommended (but not mandated) that each member contributes a minimum of (a measly) 1000 crowns per week for upkeep.
- BN Etiquette: Avoid using "sticky bombs," killing AFK players, and "feeding" other players. These are considered unfair tactics. (See Terminology section)
- Activity: Members will be removed from the guild upon reaching 1 month of inactivity. If you know you will be away from the game for an extended period of time, notify an officer so that you may be pardoned from removal.
Recruitment and Ranks
We generally have a closed recruitment policy, wherein officers invite based on their own judgment of a player's demeanor and enthusiasm for Blast Network. While we do not recruit upon request, there are exceptions to the policy to be made arbitrarily.
Promotions are also made arbitrarily and do not require the fulfillment of any specific tasks. However, here are some guidelines to follow:
- Know and abide by the guild rules and policies
- Play BN (This is a BN guild, after all)
- Be active
- Be helpful to your guildmates
Terminology
- Sticky bombs / stickies: In BN, an exploitation of a glitch in which two or more players occupy the same square and one player places a bomb, causing the other player(s) to be unable to move, or "sticking" them. Victims of sticking will only be able to move once the player who originally placed the bomb moves off of it.
Note: We do understand that stickies happen by accident, often as a defense against getting stickied. However, do not take advantage of the sticky. Stickies should never be used intentionally.
- AFK (Away From Keyboard): Describes a player who is away from their computer and is unable to actively participate in the game.
- Feeding: In BN, the act of intentionally, repeatedly dying in order to increase the score of another player/team.
The Top Brass
Founding father of the Machinists and all-around decent bloke. He is often found around Haven handing out his hard earned crowns to the needy noobie in an effort to clean up the streets and feed their begging faces.
Self-proclaimed Professor of Demolition. Many believe that she gained her BN skills from a dark Trojan ritual involving sacred drawings, a bottle of Coke, and a half pack of Mentos, but this may just be idle speculation. What we do know is her apparent lack of lag during BN matches does seem to suggest some unknown power to be at work.
Utmostprovocative [Semi-Retired]
Unfortunately due to a navigational malfunction during her escape, Utmost's escape pod landed on a sky island populated by cannibals. Fortunately for Utmost though, she felt right at home and perfected the art of cooking her own robotic kind. After years of trial and error as well as spice and herb hunting throughout the Clockworks, she stumbled upon the perfect manner of cooking her meal: Blast Network Bombs! (This just in: She is also known to totally flip out over pizza at random intervals.)
Following the horrible fiasco that was the Roarmulus Twins, the Crimson Order were forced to move on to their next dastardly plot, the "Quite Unhinged Aptenodyte: Robotic Terror Inducing Contraption" project, a psychotic killer robotic penguin. Unfortunately, due to a rushed time table and shoddy wiring, the Q.U.A.R.T.I.C. was only able to properly function and unleash it's devastation within the Blast Network Coliseum; everywhere else it only inflicted knights with bad luck and misfortune. So please do your part to combat this terror by blaming Q.U.A.R.T.I.C. for everything.
An egotistical son of a unicorn.The Professor's right-hand man! 'Nuff said...for now. He is also composed of expired pickle juices, along with other unnamed disgusting substances.
Having conquered the BN arena of the Rising Sun, "Googorraa" has traveled through the Clockworks and arrived at the borders of Krogmo's kingdom to do the same here. With his exotic gameplay and following his samurai code, Googorraa cuts through his BN competition like a seasoned sushi chef through a freshly caught puffer fish. He sees everyone as an honorable adversary...but never shares his sake!
Believes in magical unicorns. Kzane did see one wandering about one day in the gardens of Haven Time Square (Tilybb think it's Shmoot). The gender of Kzane is unknown, for now. It always carries a bag of chips somewhere... Also known to rage a lot.
Baked in Lord Vanaduke's private kitchen, this cute widdle Muffin was cast out with the trash due to an excess of cuddliness. She now resides in the Rescue Camp, participating in raids on Firestorm Citadel. In her free time she enjoys coloring Krogmo's Coliseum with bomb blasts. Rarely known to speak in the Coliseum for reasons unknown.
Little is known about this unique specimen. For now, research all around the world has gathered enough information to state that Quantsr is not, as many believe, Batman. He is also discovered to be an exotic Brazilian specimen for exclusive feasting by his fellow guild mate, Utmostprovocative.
Born into aristocracy, Sprunkles knew a life of peace and plenty. However, he was a knight ruled by passion, wants, and desires. One of which was...Lady Vanaduke. Unfortunately, Lord Vanaduke heard word of his ambition and Sprunket was driven naked into the Clockworks to die. It is a mystery how such a pampered wet sop such as he should survive, but survive he did, emerging in strange robes and wielding a blunt potato peeler. Deep in the Clockworks, Sprunkles discovered an ancient shrine to the BN Snipe God and was given the holy duty by that deity of converting the masses and making as many "sacrifices" in the BN arena as possible...he is a very faithful acolyte.
Look up "Pro BN player" in the SK wiki and her picture is next to it. This scarred and grizzled warrior of the BN circuit has forgotten more about taking lives in the BN arena in an hour than most could hope to learn in a lifetime! She also constantly mumbles to herself and can't leave the guild hall without turning the lights on and off 7 times...we're not sure what that's all about.